A Liberal, a RINO, and a Libertarian go for a Walk

[ltorlo64]

Found this on another site and liked it, so I thought I would share.

A Liberal, RINO and libertarian politician walk down the sidewalk when they come upon a homeless woman in the street.

The RINO reaches into his pocket and gives the lady a quarter.

The Libertarian offers the lady a job at his store.

The liberal yells at his two friends for being so cheap and demands that they give her a dollar each for the homeless woman. They both give the liberal a dollar which she proceeds to pocket. The liberal then gives the homeless woman a nickel, congratulates herself for being such a good person and tells the woman if she wants more money, she needs to defeat the other two in the next election.

[was_peacemaker]

Isn't that the truth.

[JTHunter]

That's a rehashing of the old joke where they are at a funeral of a friend. The friends had agreed years before that who ever went first, the other three would put $10 in the casket. The Republican put in his $10 bill and passed on. The Libertarian put in 2 $5 bills and passed on. The Liberal put in a check for $30 and picked up his predecessor's money.

[ltorlo64]

That's a rehashing of the old joke where they are at a funeral of a friend. The friends had agreed years before that who ever went first, the other three would put $10 in the casket. The Republican put in his $10 bill and passed on. The Libertarian put in 2 $5 bills and passed on. The Liberal put in a check for $30 and picked up his predecessor's money.

That would work better as a IOU or a check written from a Chinese bank account.

[JTHunter]

That would work better as a IOU or a check written from a Chinese bank account.

Wouldn't matter - in the casket means it will never get "collected".

[Kadmos]

That's a rehashing of the old joke where they are at a funeral of a friend. The friends had agreed years before that who ever went first, the other three would put $10 in the casket. The Republican put in his $10 bill and passed on. The Libertarian put in 2 $5 bills and passed on. The Liberal put in a check for $30 and picked up his predecessor's money.

And old lawyer joke actually....


A wealthy man on his death bed called his three best friends-- his doctor, his priest, and his lawyer-- to make a final request. "Who knows what I will find on the other side? Just to be sure, I am giving you each one hundred thousand dollars and I ask that you place an envelope with that amount in my casket." All three took the money and agreed to fulfill his wish.

He died soon thereafter and at the funeral each friend slipped an envelope into the casket. After the burial, the three walked together from the grave. The doctor said, "My friends, I have a confession to make; since the hospital was short of funds for treating the poor I only put 80, 000 dollars in the envelope and donated the other 20, 000 to our indigent fund." The priest then said, "I too have to confess that I gave 50,000 dollars to the homeless and only put fifty thousand in the casket."

The lawyer looked both his friends straight in the eye and said, "I am astonished and deeply disappointed that you failed to keep your solemn promise to our dear departed friend. I want you to know that I placed in his coffin my personal check for the full 100, 000 dollars."

[studmuffin]

A reverend lay on his death bed. He was known to be polite but very pious in his life. He made a last request that the town lawyer and the owner of the towns used car lot be brought to his bed side. Eventually both men arrived and sat down on either side of his bed. Not a word was spoken. In the long thunderous silence the town lawyer finally spoke out, ask the dying minister why he had summoned them knowing that he had sermonized against them railing at their theiving ways for many years. In fact both were quite suprised to be summoned to his deathbed.

In a weezing voice the minster explained that jesus had died between two thieves and that he intended to die the same way.

[Schuetzenman]

Fixed your punch line typo.

[N/A]

Fixed your punch line typo.

Then you should have spelled it "wheezing" and capitalized the J in
Jesus.