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Thread: How about a "make a story" game?

  1. #101
    Team GunsNet Silver 04/2015 Nobeard's Avatar

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    "...it could be on the other side of the county by now."
    Shoving both hands into the pockets of his trench coat, he hunched his shoulders then nodded toward the road they had come in on.
    "You both saw the trail of carnage it left between that camp trailer and this shit-hole of a town!"

    "Yea..." Agent Dangerfield added, "Never seen so many raped sheep in my whole life!"

    Agents Dice and Kinison looked at each other in disbelief.
    "Oh surely you MUST have!" Kinison sneered.

    "Really?" Dice added, "You wear a blindfold when bangin' your furry dates?"

    "No Respect!" Dangerfield growled, "I gets no respect from youse two!"

    Ralph pointed toward the shambling figures that were now less then 50 yards away....

  2. #102
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    Meanwhile in Lancaster.....

    CARL! CARL!

    Quick roundup Jebediah and the rest of the commandos. I just got word from Otis....vee got big trouble!

    Vee got to get to Cooterville awful durn quick!
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  3. #103
    Team GunsNet Silver 04/2015 Nobeard's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nobeard View Post
    Ralph pointed toward the shambling figures that were now less then 50 yards away....
    "...you fellas gonna do sumthin about them?!?" He demanded

    Agent Dice cocked an eyebrow and looked at Ralph in disbelief. "Oh. Really...and just how, EXACTLY, did this become OUR problem!?
    Taking a long drag on the Marlboro, he turned to the other agents.
    "Five minutes ago?..." he hooked a thumb in Ralph's direction, "this burger-flippin' dingleberry didn't WANT us in his parking lot..." after exhaling smoke from his nose, Dice continued in a snarky tone "...but now? We're supposed to be his PERSONAL cleaning crew!"
    Turning back to Ralph, Dice did a full body shake and wrapped his arm around behind his head. Taking a 'backhanded' drag from the cigarette, he exhaled a cloud of smoke in Ralph's direction:
    "You, are un-FOOKIN' buh-leave-a-bull!!!" he added with a laugh

  4. #104
    Team GunsNet Silver 04/2015 Nobeard's Avatar

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    Before Ralph could respond, the diner's sceen door swung open and Ferd's sister stepped out.
    "Dang it Ralph!" she yelled, "Will you go out back an swap the propane tank? The stoves a goin' out!"

    Ralph spun around and threw his hands up.
    "Gawl-dang it Ferditta!" He pointed toward the shambling creatures, "We got more important problems to...."
    Ralph stopped short, slowly lowering his arm.

    The grey skinned mutants had stopped as well, both staring at Ferditta
    ". . . bbbbop shoo whut ? . ." One of them stammered. ". . .rama shama hamma . . " the other wheezed.

    "What in the corn-fed hell are THOSE?!?" Ferditta demanded.

    Orange eyes bulged in terror as the grey-skinned freaks began shaking violently, backing away from the diner.
    ". . . SHAMA LAMA BLING-BANG ! . ." they screeched.

    Then, suddenly...
    Last edited by Nobeard; 04-10-2021 at 06:35 AM.

  5. #105
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    Sheriff Talton and deputy Piccolo came racing into the parking lot smashing Lester and Martha under the prowl car and screeching to a halt just inches from hitting Ralph and agent Dice.

    Ralph bellowed, bout gotdamn time you showed up, I called your lazy asses over an hour ago. What the hell am I paying taxes for??? So you can lounge around that fucking new Dunkin Donuts all day while the town is over run with zombies!?!

    Calm down Ralph calm down.
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  6. #106
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    Otis paced impatiently on the platform of the train station. He stopped pacing and stamped out his cigarette when he heard a train blow it's horn in the distance.

    He prayed that the Commandos were on it.
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  7. #107
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    The doors of the train opened and the Commados piled out and Kyle was with them, the purple shotgun slung across his back.

    As he stepped off the train Kyle and Otis stared at each other. The two brothers had not spoken since their falling out over ferditta.

    They walked up to each other.....and embraced in a bear hug.

    The Amish Commandos cheered and began to pat them on the back.
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  8. #108
    Team GunsNet Silver 04/2015 Nobeard's Avatar

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    Quote Originally Posted by weevil View Post
    Sheriff Talton and deputy Piccolo came racing into the parking lot smashing Lester and Martha under the prowl car and screeching to a halt just inches from hitting Ralph and agent Dice.

    Ralph bellowed, bout gotdamn time you showed up, I called your lazy asses over an hour ago. What the hell am I paying taxes for??? So you can lounge around that fucking new Dunkin Donuts all day while the town is over run with zombies!?!

    Calm down Ralph calm down.
    "How for fucks sake!" Agent Dice grumbled. He pushed the earpiece with his fingertip and spoke into his sleeve.
    "Cancel the update - we HAD confirmed cases but local law en-farce-ment just splattered them with a patrol car before they could be quarantined."
    He paused, listening to the reply...
    "There's two possible cases that just passed our location heading south toward the train station.'
    Again he paused, then rolled his eyes. "Yea! we're on it! Will update asap." He started to lower his sleeve, then raised it and added: "You ugly freak-a-nature!"

    Sheriff Talton eyed Agent Dice suspiciously: "And just who might you be?" he asked in an authoritative tone.

    "Well..." Diceman replied with a long, drawn out laugh as he lit a fresh Marlboro.
    "I MIGHT have been your daddy, but that German Sheppard beat me over the fence!"
    Stomping his right heel on the pavement he pocketed the zippo with a flourish and barked:"OH!"
    Last edited by Nobeard; 04-10-2021 at 10:38 AM.

  9. #109
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    "Well I might be the guy that gives a shit..." Agent Kinison chuckled
    An instant later his face was a mask of sheer rage BUT I DON'T - oh OOOH!!!


    Agent Dangerfield mumbled to himself '...hey, I might get some respect outta these two local yokels'
    "Hey, Sheriff!" he started to answer. "I'm..."

    "Shut the Fuck UP" Talton barked, "Nobody's talkin' ta YOU!"

    Rodney looked skyward and rolled his eyes, "I never get no respect!" he lamented.

    Deputy Piccolo was watching the scene unfold with his left little finger buried up to the second knuckle in his nostril...

  10. #110
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    "Well these Yukon's have government license plates!" Deputy Piccolo high-pitched voice was like nails on a chalk board.
    "They might be federal agents"

    "Very good!" Agent Dice acknowledged, "Figure that out all by yourself did ya?"
    Then he added with a grimace. "What the fuck are you doin'? Scratching the backside of that eyeball?!"

    "Enough of your smart mouth!" Sheriff Talton snapped before turning to his deputy. "get yer danged finger outta yer nose!" he whispered.
    Turning back to Agent Dice he continued. "I like to see some ID!"

  11. #111
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    As the two zombies raced to the train station, Carl camly pulled back the bolt of his Arisaka and slid a round into the chamber.

    He knew the chrysanthemum on his rifle gave it great power over evil.

    He took careful aim and squeezed the trigger......Jimmie-Joe exploded into a red mist.
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  12. #112
    Team GunsNet Silver 04/2015 Nobeard's Avatar

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    "Okay..." Agent Dice shrugged, all three men reached into their jackets.

    Agent Dice withdrew his hand with the middle finger extended
    "And I'd like to see Charlize Theron sprawled out at my feet, playing with her twat!"

    Agent Kinison followed suit. "Make mine Natalie Portman!" he grinned, middle finger extended.


    Agent Dangerfield shrugged and held up his middle finger. "Why bother, I never get no respect..." Turning to Dice, he quipped:
    "so what's up with you and BALD chicks?!"

    Dice shrugged. "Just one a those things, ya know?..."
    Then he added. "What? Never jumped on one of yours after it was sheered?"

    "There we go!.." Dangerfield rolled his eyes skyward again, "No respect - Never! Not an ounce!!!"

    Sheriff Talton glared angrily and was about to start yelling when the distant sound of a rifle shot split the air.

  13. #113
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    That sounded like an Arisaka thought Ralph!

    HOT DAMN THE AMISH ARE HERE!!!

    Now we'll finally get some action, he shouted and pumped his fists in the air!
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  14. #114
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    Hearing this, Agent Diceman shouted "Son of a BITCH!!" His head snapping to one side as he spoke.
    "Come on!" he yelled at Sheriff Talton and pointed toward the train station.
    "We need to catch up with those two infected idiots that ran past here before somebody turns them into catfood!"

    As the agents jumped into their Yukons, Sheriff Talton and Deputy Piccolo turned toward their cruiser.
    The tires were completely flat and the body had already started to dissolve from the thick splattering of ooze left on the undercarriage after hitting Lester and Martha.

    Revving the engine, Agent Diceman saw the two local yokels starring with their mouths hanging open in disbelief.
    "What?!" He demanded. "Quit standing there trying to catch flied and GET IN!!!

    "All right FINE!" The sheriff agreed as they piled into the back seat.
    "But seriously - I've gotta call this in and do paperwork!" He leaned forward between the front bucket seats. "So just which agency ARE you three with?!?

    "HOLD on sweet-cakes!" Agent Dice said with a sarcastic lilt in his voice as he floored the accelerator.
    Last edited by Nobeard; 04-10-2021 at 11:56 AM.

  15. #115
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    HEY!!! HEY!!!

    You can't just leave that piece of shit in the middle of my parking lot....it's fucking-up my asphalt. The county's gonna pay for this shit!!!

    SONSABITCHES!!!

    .....Ralph shouted as he chased after them throwing rocks.
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  16. #116
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    I gotta take a whiz, Kyle said as he ducked into the restroom.

    As he entered a voice from the back stall said, "hello my love.."

    It was Kamala...the two embraced and started sucking face, then Kamala began to speak in a strange voice with a Venusian accent.

    Otis must die!

    You have the purple shotgun.....do your job!!!
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  17. #117
    Team GunsNet Silver 04/2015 Nobeard's Avatar

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    As the lead Yukon launched out of the parking lot, Sheriff Talton was thrown all the way into the cargo area with a resounding 'thud'. Finding himself surrounded by multiple plastic cases and containers secured with cargo straps, he scrambled desperately to regain the back seat as the jet black vehicle rocketed toward the train station. The vehicle power braked around a corner and lurched to one side. A car horn blared for a brief instant then quickly faded into the distance.

    "Great googly moogly Sheriff!" Piccollo squealed, looking over his shoulder. "Are you okay!?!"

    Finally managing to grab a strap in each hand, the sheriff sputtered, "I think so..."

    "Careful ladies!" Agent Dice snapped, glancing in the rear view mirror
    "That's top secret government property, ya break it - ya BOUGHT it!"

    Holding on for dear life, Sheriff Talton's eyes swept over the containers, each was emblazoned with the same logo:
    O.H.S.H.I.T. Force

    The sheriff did a double take, squinting at the lettering. "Who in the hell are you people!?!"

    "Were the OH SHIT Force!" Agent Diceman shot back as he careened the Yukon around another corner.

    "Tha whuuuut???" Piccollo's irritating voice trailed off in disbelief.

    "Office of Homeland Security Homeworld and Interplanatary Tactical!" Diceman replied proudly.
    He looked at them from the rear view mirror, gave a wink / kiss adding:
    "an don't...FORCE me to say it again!" then snapped his fingers and punctuated the reply with a resounding "OH!"

  18. #118
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    Piccollo shook his head in disbelief, "I've never heard of..."

    "Of course not!" Agent Diceman interrupted. "Every heard of the Mud Monkeys from Mercury, or the Venusian Sex Bots?"
    Both passengers were silent.

    "What about the Martian Carpet Munchers, or Jerk-Offs from Jupiter?" he paused, both men were still silent.

    "Well!" he continued, "There's also the Neptunian Nymphos, which happen to be my personal favorite, but DON'T ask about those Perverts from Pluto."

    The Yukon swerved and skidded several times before the sheriff finally managed to ask: "Uh...what about Saturn?..."

    "No action there" Dice replied, then pounded the dash with a hysterical laugh: "Some IDIOT put a ring on it!"

  19. #119
    Team GunsNet Bronze 07/2011 weevil's Avatar

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    On the westside of Cooterville in the parking lot of a seedy fleabag motel a '59 Cadillac Eldorado it's tailfins gleaming in the sunlight, roared to life the rumble of it's massive engine filled the morning air.

    Behind the wheel sat a huge burly looking woman with a scarf wrapped around her neck and a katana on the seat.
    Last edited by weevil; 04-10-2021 at 08:31 PM.
    Where are we going and why are we in this handbasket???

  20. #120
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    As the Yukon skidded to a stop, Piccollo asked: "What about Uranus?"

    "Uhh..." Agent Diceman glanced side to side then turned in his seat, seeming apprehensive. "...sure you want to know?"

    "Yes!" he nodded fervently, "What comes from there?..."

    Diceman leaned toward him, as if about to whisper some great cosmic secret.

    "Pull my finger and find out!!!" he bellowed, did a rolling finger snap then slapped the palm of his left hand on top of his right fist.

    "Oh! whatta SNAPPA-HEAD!!!" Kicking open the door, he exited the Yukon. "Chop-chop ladies, we HAVE arrived!"

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